We need more

I have come to the realization that this country, this world, the chronic pelvic pain sufferers like myself who struggle to get both in and out of bed every day deserve and need more doctors and medical professionals to treat and hopefully solve the enigma of Pudendal Neuralgia and Pudendal Nerve Entrapment.

There are so many doctors out there. At a recent wedding I attended, (how I made it through, I don't know... it must have been my supremely cute outfit), I spoke to a well-seasoned urologist about how he was struggling to find a junior partner so that he might retire someday soon. Where are all the specialists going?

I must get back on track. So, it doesn't really take a specialist to learn about PN/PNE, just a motivated medical professional who is willing to study cadavers, learn the mechanics of the Pudendal Nerve, its purposes and its duties, and how it can become compressed or entrapped. Then, the most important of all is HOW CAN WE UNENTRAP THE NERVE IN THE LEAST INVASIVE METHOD POSSIBLE WITHOUT SUCH POOR SURGICAL OUTCOMES?? I know my doctor cares tremendously about his Pudendal patients. I think he is to be commended because he is actually teachable, for being such an accomplished professor and individual himself. Where are the drugs for neuropathic pain that don't come with SEVERE and sometimes deadly side effects?

I hope there is a medical student, resident, fellow, or even attending physician that is reading this blog entry right now because their patient presents with mysterious pelvic pain symptoms. Consider what nerve innervates the majority of the pelvis. Look to the source of how pain signals are even transmitted to our brains..... nerves.

If you have read my previous blog entries, you will see that I have a Bachelors and Masters in Music. NOT MEDICINE. However, I am a patient keenly aware of my body, where my pain lies, and I will not stop my big mouth flapping about this disease until it is as easy to cure as appendicitis.

Help me by posting, emailing me at fightpne@yahoo.com, or contacting me on this blog. I need help. WE NEED HELP. I speak for so many others. SO.MANY.OTHERS. For doctors that have this disease, for PhDs who have had to stop their teaching due to this disease, for singers/songwriters paralyzed by pelvic pain, for young mothers desperate to know what is wrong with them, for cyclists and former engineers who now live on disability.

And, I must close with this: God have mercy on us.

Anxiety will be turned into VICTORY

I am anxious. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything with prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. (Phillipians 4:6)

And? And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. (Phillipians 4:7)

Sooo.......... God (talking in Junior Asparagus voice for added effect), I know you're bigger than the boogie man (my pain, the pudendal nerve entrapment, whatever). So, will you come into my mind and guard it and take me out of this pit, this circle of hell that the enemy wants me to remain in? (Ok, Junior Asparagus wouldn't go that far to say that....) Junior would just say, "God, fix my problems, mkay? Thanks, Love, Junior"

Junior didn't take any Ativans. Junior was not on Valium. Junior fell and got a bruised knee and just knew God would fix it. I want Junior's faith.

When I went to the Cleansing Stream retreat this past weekend, I heard a few things. Many interceded for me for specific things. One thing I was told twice is this verse: My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Another time, when I was renouncing the spirit of infirmity, the prayer partner simply knew I had nerve damage in my pelvis. He told me while praying for me that God would unravel the scar tissue from around the nerves and space would be made for them. Prophetic? I think so. I bet you any money this is what I need. Well, I know I have scar tissue and I know the Alcock's canal is a tight squeezy of a space.

Surgery. 5 weeks from today I will be done with my right sided decompression. I am praying that at the same time, Dr. Hibner can fix what needs fixed on my left (always has been my worst side, even after these 6.5 months). Please, God, please please please please please I am begging you take my pain away. Show your MERCY!

I can hear from God the most clearly when I am entrenched in deep worship. I was so fortunate to be able to attend the Bay of the Holy Spirit revival in Youngstown, Ohio recently. I wrote to my PNE friend, A, from CA, who was watching the revival live online at the time, via text after God showed me this during worship:

A, I want healed so badly. God gave me pictures of His love for me, while carrying the cross. His nerves were severed for me, He cried on the cross as He died for me, His mother wept, He cried in pain on the cross but He did it so I would be healed.

He was mocked and scourged and spit on but he had MY healing in HIS wings when He flew forth alive from that tomb.

Every tear He cried as He had his nerves ripped apart, He did it so that mine would someday be made whole.

I wanted to put this into writing, not only so I would remember, but that someone else might be touched. You may not even suffer with Pudendal Nerve Entrapment, but just put your request in the spot of where I put "nerves" or something else.

I haven't blogged in weeks as I've been so physically attacked. God thank you for giving me the strength and endurance to write this tonight.

I want to share a song God has put on my heart. It is a very anointed song. God bless.